I think it’s more common now to call a bidet insert a bidet. So just an inser that you fasten between the seat and bowl with an arm for turning on and off the spray. That connects to a T adapter at the inlet on the toilet. Works really good and costs 20-80€/$
This. In my part of the world, Nordics. No one has it, except really old bathrooms that have a separate bowl with o detachable shower head. But I only saw that once in my life. I installed one a year ago and it’s a game changer.
Somehow my first thought was… Snow Crash